Why Didn't You Tell Me?
by TheYesBarrage
Summary: AU: Kevin starts stripping to make ends meet for he and Shawn. What happens when a friend catches Kevin's secret job and when Shawn eventually finds out


**Because I just ship Shawn and Kevin so much and finally sat down to write a story on them. Takes place in around 1997 or so. Still AU, but just sdhkfshfs hang on for the ride. I don't own anyone that shows up they are property of themselves and WWE.**

The pulsing of the music in the club was numbing to Kevin. He was getting ready to do something he swore he'd never do. Something he swore he'd never do that he'd been doing for months now. Something that would make him a hypocrite to his boyfriend. A hypocrite to himself. He didn't want to do this but it was the only thing he could think of doing after recently being let go of from his job. Times were tough and making ends meet grew harder and harder by the day. He hadn't even told Shawn he lost his job. Shawn thought that Kevin was at work every night, and in a way he was right. Kevin was at work. Just not at the job he thought he was in.

"Big Sexy you go on in 5." A crew guy came to the back to tell Kevin who just nodded his head as he stood at the curtain entrance. He took a deep breath as the last guy came off the stage. Kevin was announced and got on stage, doing his routine. He felt degraded. He felt so small, even though he was so tall. He felt horrible but it was the only thing he felt he could do. He did get good tips along with his pay. He would often just keep the money hidden til the end of the month and just pull it out then so Shawn thought he was still getting paid from his other job , explaining that he was getting bonuses for good work. Kevin almost told Shawn the truth last night but Shawn told him how proud he was that he was working so hard for them. Shawn had no clue how hard he was working, what he was doing..just for them. Kevin was willing to let people ogle him, look at him like a sex object all for the sake of keeping a roof over he and his boyfriends head. It's not like Shawn didn't work, he did little jobs here and there. It was hard to get job after leaving the porn industry. People weren't as open and accepting, especially with the type of porn Shawn was doing. Even if it was 1997, people weren't that open to gay porn. Shawn was a very popular star in that outlet until he met Kevin and Kevin pleaded with him to stop. He told him that he was worth so much more than selling his body like that and then here was Kevin, stripping at a gay strip bar. Being a hypocrite. Each dollar he earned he felt dirty about. Shawn had no clue where the money was truly coming from, but Kevin did and it killed him. Kevin's set had ended and he collected all the tips he had made and got off stage. When he returned to the back he was shocked, horrified to see his friend Hunter standing there with his arms crossed. He had been caught.

"Kev, get dressed. We clearly need to talk" Hunter told him sternly before turning on his heel and heading to the front of the club. Kevin quickly got dressed, picked up his pay for the day and stuffed it in his coat pocket before meeting Hunter outside.

"Look, I can explain" Kevin started but Hunter cut him off

"How could you do this?" He crossed his arms. "How long has this been going on? You know how Shawn gets if he thinks someone is looking at you. Imagine if he knew you were just showing yourself off like this?"

"I know and I feel horrible for it"

"You certainly didn't seem to feel horrible for it while you were shaking your ass to Cher up there."

"Hunter, please let me explain"

"You have 3 minutes"

"Look...I lost my job months ago. I didn't have the heart to tell Shawn so I decided to keep the money coming in and I know it was stupid to decide this, but I decided to just strip. I make more a week here than I did in two months at my old job. I can't tell Shawn. He'd think I'm a hypocrite but I'm only doing this til I find another job, then I'm going to quit"

"Are you stupid?" Hunter glared at him "You lose your job, are too cowardly to tell your boyfriend who probably would have gladly helped you find another job and instead decide to start stripping. Did you even think that idea through?"

"Hunter, I don't need this. I feel bad enough as it is"

"You should feel bad!"

"Hunter, enough okay. I get it. I made a stupid decision"

"Stupid is not the word for it"

"Are you done? I need to get home to Shawn."

"Do you really? Or do you have a side job as a prostitute?"

"Can you not? I'm really not in the mood for this" Kevin glared down at Hunter. "I get what I'm doing is stupid and I feel shitty enough. Every time I get on that stage and remove my clothes for all those whistling men I feel disgusting. Believe me I'm not doing it for fun. I'm doing it because I have to"

"No one said you HAD to strip for money. Just like no one said Shawn HAD to get into porn."

"Don't bring that up"

"What if he got back into porn because he claimed he HAD to. How would you feel?"

"This is different"

"Is it really? I don't feel it is"

"I'm not having sex on camera for money"

"You are getting basically naked for money. Isn't it just as degrading?"

"Yes but at least I'm not bending over letting random guys have their way with me" Kevin realized how harsh what he said sounded and worse he felt Hunter would take it as a stab at Shawn and it really wasn't. He was just so aggravated with Hunter that he was losing control of how he was wording things.

"Oh so basically you think Shawn is a whore because that's what it sounds like"

"That's not it"

"Then what is it"

"I don't have to explain myself to you" Kevin turned on his heel and started walking towards he and Shawn's home. He could hear a dialing pad being tapped knowing that Hunter was probably telling Shawn his secret. He was probably going to get kicked out the house and broken up with. Shawn was usually rational unless Hunter told him something to which rationality took a backseat always. Kevin slowly walked to the apartment complex, trying to examine every possible way he could get Shawn to see things his way. Nothing seemed to work. Shawn was going to hate him. There was no way around it. He got to the complex and walked up the stairs to their apartment and slowly opened the door. He was faced with Shawn sitting on the coffee table, his arms crossed as he faced the door. He looked pissed which he understood to a degree. It all came out to how Hunter worded what he told Shawn that would truly determine how the rest of this night would go.

"Why couldn't you just tell me you lost your job" Shawn started off. "And stripping? How could you? The idea of other men enjoying looking at you hurts me. Didn't you tell me to get out of porn because I'm worth so much more than being seen as a sex object. How hypocritical"

"I know but Shawn I just..."

"You just what? Wanted to strip for other guys. Cheat on me? I feel you probably are I mean you didn't tell me you were stripping, you might as well be fuckin people on the side. What are their names?"

"Shawn, you are being irrational right now" Kevin put his bag down against the door and leaned against it not wanting to be close to Shawn in case he tried to attack him, in which he seemed close to doing. "I'm not cheating on you. I know it was stupid to turn to stripping but I couldn't will myself to tell you, you know why?"

"No why?" Shawn asked not uncrossing his arms, still keeping this stern pissed look on his face.

"Because I didn't want to seem pathetic to you. All this time I was the bread winner. I did the working. I did everything for you. You never had to want for anything because I'd take care of it for you. Losing my job. I felt like I failed you. Like I failed us. I hate getting on that stage and stripping for cheap tips. I hate it. I know how much you'd hate it but I just...didn't want to seem like a failure to you" Kevin looked down sadly fighting back tears. He never explained how he felt like that and realizing how he felt made those emotions he felt from getting fired come back full force. Shawn got up and walked over to his boyfriend and wrapped his arms around him and reached up to wipe his tears with his finger.

"You idiot" Shawn shook his head. "I don't care if we were poor on the streets living in a dumpster. I love you for you, not for the things you can do for me. You helped me see I have self worth. You helped me feel like more than just a sex puppet. You were the first person to really be like hey, you are worth so much more than this. Hunter never did...he didn't seem to really care what I did so long as I had money for when we had bowling nights" Shawn laughed dryly as he looked up at Kevin. "I wouldn't have thought you failed me. I know times are tough out here. I'm glad we have all this money, but I want you to quit stripping. I'm sure we have enough money to last us for a bit. I'll help you tomorrow morning to look for another job. I want you to know I love you and you are better than this." Shawn got on his tip toes and kissed Kevin gently. "Promise me you won't go back in that club"

"I won't" Kevin wrapped his arms around Shawn lightly "Thanks for understanding."

"Don't thank me. I love you. It comes with the territory" He smiled up at him. "So how much did you make today?"

"A little over 600."

"Well then. Give me it" Shawn held his hand out as Kevin reached in his pocket and pulled an envelope out and put it in Shawn's hand. Shawn disappeared with it for a moment and brought out a bank he had gotten and put the money in there. "We will keep this in here. It'll last us for a good while seeing as you paid for the rent already. You'll get a job in no time" Shawn said as he placed the bank down on the table and sat down on the couch "Come sit with me" Shawn told his boyfriend who took his coat off and put it on the hook by the door and went to join him on the couch. Shawn leaned against him, resting his head on his shoulder as he snaked his arm around his waist. "I truly do love you Kevin, but never do anything like this again...ever. Never be afraid to tell me the truth. I love you for all you are, no matter what happens."

"I promise Shawnie" Kevin kissed his forehead. "I love you too"

"No matter what?"

"No matter what"


End file.
